Continue reading]]> This is me on the treadmill at the gym! For month 5 of my own personal parenting plan, I have been working on going to the gym 3 times per week so that I have more energy to be present for my kids and more energy to hang out and spend time with them. I did go to the gym 3 times this week, yahoo! I am pregnant and in my first trimester, so maybe that’s why I’m feeling so tired, but this week went pretty well. I found myself being more patient with the kids and yesterday we played games together and the day before that we made cookies together, which was really fun.  Every day is a bit of a challenge (energy wise) but I’m trying really hard to do what I can to make that better and trying not to make excuses.

Also, for now I am going to take a break from posting about my parenting plan weekly because I would like to have time to post more about my pregnancy.  Since this will be my last pregnancy, I want to document what it’s been like for me and since this will be a new experience (having a midwife and not an OB), I am excited to share with you what I am going through.  I will probably go to posting about the parenting plan monthly or so and then continue back up with it after the baby is born maybe.

Continue reading]]> Hey there!  It’s a great day here where I live.  We just had a snow storm come through and clear out the nasty nasty air we had been having for the last few weeks.  I can breathe again!

Well, as you know, each month I have been working on a new parenting goal to help me become a better Mom. I call it my parenting plan and I am working on my 5th month and my 20th week.  I post about my experiences each week.  I’ve had some successes and some failures.

I had kind of slacked off for a few years while I was going through some major health issues and then later working full time and I got into some pretty bad parenting habits.  I want to be better at what I consider the most important job on earth (and sometimes the most challenging job on earth).

This month I am working on getting healthy and getting my blood moving so I actually have energy to hang out and be present with my kids.  I am working on going to the gym 3 times a week.  I confess, I only went 2 times last week.  I don’t like making excuses, because they are pointless, but I had some good ones and some bad ones too (laziness).  I will be better this week and just got back from the gym a few minutes ago.  I feel  so much better when I make the effort to go, but it’s oh so hard to get myself dressed and out of the house so early in the morning.

I have found that going to the gym consistently for a couple months now has really changed my energy level (even though I’m in my first trimester of pregnancy – which is known for pretty severe fatigue).  I have found I don’t need naps as often, which means I can get more done around the house, which means I am less stressed, which means I can give more of myself to my kids and let go and have fun.  Win Win Win.

Continue reading]]> I can’t believe we are on month 5 of the parenting plan already and so far I feel like I have made so much progress if I look back to the first month.  Baby steps are so much easier for me and I have tried to set attainable goals for myself that I can actually accomplish without too much effort.  I’m a busy Mom of 3 (and one on the way) and I don’t have a lot of spare time, so I need something that is going to be quick, easy, and effective.

This month I am working on getting my body in shape so I will have more energy to be “present” and attentive with my kids.  Last week was pretty much an epic fail, mostly because of the pregnancy and those pregnancy hormones running amuck in my body.  I have been tired and restless, but this week I’ve been able to sleep which has been a much needed reprieve.

This week I am feeling better.  I’m glad I kept up with going to the gym and doing the treadmill for an hour 3 times a week.  I have had more energy and have been more patient and conscious when around my kids.  I didn’t even yell or get mad when my daughter dropped a glass of hot chocolate on the kitchen floor and broke my favorite mug.  Now, that’s restraint!

Anyway, I hope this kind of inspires you to keep going on your own goals.  There will be some good days and bad days.  That’s normal right?  Please post a comment if you have a goal you would like to share and how you’ve accomplished it.

Continue reading]]> Well, for my parenting plan, this month I’m working on going to the gym 3 or more times a week so I can have more energy to spend some extra quality time with my kids.  It’s a New Year’s Resolution of sorts.  Last week I went to the gym 4 times.  I haven’t found that I have had more energy though.  Maybe it will take more time and patience is not a virtue I was blessed with.

I had a rough day yesterday, I was really tired and grumpy.  I have found my kids don’t care.  They will crawl in bed with me or jump on the couch next to where I’m sitting and just want to talk, even on (my) bad days.  That’s why I love them so much because they are so forgiving.  I have such a long way to go to becoming better and I’m constantly aware of that.  I do feel better when I’m trying.  Not every week of this parenting plan has been a success for me and I’m sure there will be many in the future that bomb big time, but I’d like to keep trying despite failures and look forward to successes.  I’m going to keep up with this and I will let you know how it goes next week!

Please post a comment if you have any suggestions for me!

Continue reading]]> I took it upon myself to have a social media and blogging break while my kids were out of school for Christmas break.  It was wonderful and I feel more centered, but it’s also good to be back as I love writing about my experiences as a Mom and I love to keep trying to get better.  While we’re talking about getting better, it is the time of year where we think about resolutions and goals and how we would like to improve.

I have 2 resolutions for 2013. 

1. To exercise 3 times per week or more (at the gym where I just purchased a membership).  This provides me with an hour of undisturbed time to myself where I can zone out and watch the news on TV with no distractions.  I love it!  It’s my favorite time of the day.  The gym I go to is only $10 a month and no contract.  I can handle that!  I plan to go after I drop them off at school in the morning.

2. To spend more quality time with the kids.  I am around my kids a lot but I spend very little time doing fun things with them.  I would like to be more involved in their lives instead of just passing by each day.  We love to do things as a family and I would like to continue that.

I try to keep it simple and attainable with an action plan so that I can actually succeed at it instead of failing miserably at week one and before I’ve really started.  I have found that making a habit of my goals is what helps me to accomplish them.  I am by far no wear near perfect at it, but it does help to make a habit out of doing good things.  Don’t you agree?

I will work on the gym this month for my parenting plan, because I firmly believe that exercise will give me more energy so I can spend that quality time with the kids.  It gets my heart pumping and my blood flowing and all processes in my body (including my brain) just work better.  Have you noticed this too?  It does wonders for depression as well.

What are your resolutions?  If you would like to read a fantastic article about how to set and accomplish resolutions effectively, this one is a life changer! Click here for the article on establishing effective habits.  I hope this parenting plan is helping you a little bit.

Continue reading]]> I hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving.  Ours was perfect filled with friends, family and great food and lots of ping pong :).

This year I have been taking baby steps and working toward being a better Mom.  I have noticed an overall sense of peace, contentment and love in our home since I have been doing small things each month to improve as a Mom.  This month I am working on really listening to my kids.  Whereas before, I just would have said “uh huh” to everything my kids were saying instead of really hearing them out, this month I’ve been trying really hard to listen well and discuss things with them.

I have been worried about my busy life and the busyness interfering with my goal this month (with the holidays coming up and all).  But really it hasn’t.  I have been a lot less stressed out than I usually am this time of year and the last couple days, although they were filled with things to do, really didn’t feel stressful to me.

I’ve found this goal to occur naturally as I have tried to be better.  I still have moments where I have to seek out a child and ask them to repeat what they said because I didn’t hear them (really meaning I wasn’t listening and was distracted by something else).  But I feel a closeness to them when I really intently listen and try to understand what they’re going through.  I hope this parenting plan helps someone out there!

Continue reading]]> This week was the first snow of the season and we had lots of fun making snow angels, shoveling the driveway together, and playing in the snow.

Well, we’re already on month 4, week 2 of the Parenting Plan.  I have been working on listening to my kids more this month.  I have found when I just try… a little, I get these amazing results that I wasn’t planning on at all.  For example, this week I decided to turn off the radio when I pick the kids up at school so I could actually hear what they were saying to me.  Guess what happened?  The kids became little chatterboxes and started telling me all about their day and what happened at school. They were excited to open up and I was excited to listen.  They spend the majority of their day at school and I want their at home (and in the car) time to be one where they are heard and loved unconditionally.

This is so exciting because it used to be the car ride home from school was a highly charged and stressful time for me to wait in line to pick them up for 15 minutes and then have them yelling over the radio so no one could hear each other only to come home and all do our separate things, like homework, practicing, and work.  This very small thing has been very powerful to me.  I also realized how easy it was for me before to tune out what the kids were saying and just throw in a “uh huh” or “yeah” every now and then.  This week I  am really trying to hear what they are saying to me and be supportive.  I can’t believe I wasn’t doing this before.  I am embarrassed that I wasn’t because it’s such a simple thing, but it is what it is and I am doing this parenting plan because I want to be honest with myself about my weaknesses so that I can be better.

Continue reading]]> I don’t think I ever wrapped up month 3 before moving on to month 4.  So, in month 3 I have been working on giving my kids more hugs and reporting on the results each week.  The results have been incredible, I can’t even begin to say how helpful this challenge has been to me as a Mom and probably the most helpful of all things things I’ve done so far.  First of all, it takes only a few seconds to give a hug.  Second of all, it’s good for everyone involved.  And third, that physical affection makes everyone feel more loved, so its a win-win-win!

I started keeping track of how many hugs I was giving my kids.  I would give the youngest 10+ hugs per day, the middle one usually initiates hugs with me so I would give her 5+ per day.  But my oldest daughter used to never initiate hugs until I did this parenting plan.  I thought she was growing out of hugs, but I think she was just waiting for me to show I loved her.  After specifically being mindful of giving her lots of hugs, she has initiated hugs with me many many times. It’s made a huge huge difference to me and made me more patient and compassionate toward her struggles (and she hasn’t had as many struggles as usual).  I just wish every Mom out there would try this, it’s so incredible!

I just feel like each month with this parenting plan, I barely even have to try and I get amazing, powerful results that help me become better.  I’m always surprised by how much I’ve been blessed with and how important my family is to me.  I want to be a better Mom and the little things do make a big difference.

One last thing I noticed this month is that my kids were giving each other hugs and holding hands.  WOW!

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If you’ve forgotten, this month I’ve been working on giving my kids more hugs and then posting on what happens.  The last couple weeks have gone really well and we have been a lot closer as a family.  It really happened quickly and it was so easy.  Why didn’t I try this sooner?

This week, I’ve been noticing how the kids act with each other, and they seem to be giving each other hugs which I haven’t noticed them doing recently (since they’ve been older they give each other less hugs and as parents, we give less hugs).

Most of all, I feel closer to them and they come to me more often just to talk about things.  I don’t know if this is just because I have been consciously working on giving them more hugs.  I’m sure there are other factors involved.  But, I think it gives them security and helps them to know that they are loved, valued, and wanted.

Because of this month, my husband and I want to work on giving each other more hugs.  It can’t hurt, right?

Continue reading]]> If you haven’t been keeping up with my monthly goals, this month I have been working on giving my kids more hugs.  This is my second week with this goal, but generally I choose a different parenting goal each month and do baby steps to achieve it.  That’s just how I work best.

It hasn’t been a perfect week.  I guess it never is a perfect week.  It has been a great week until this morning when I woke up to my kids arguing and crying in the kitchen over a bag of granola.  It started off the day on the wrong foot and now I’m feeling worn out and in a bad mood.  I have to remind myself that sometimes there will be bad days, but I still need to keep trying.

I have still been working on giving my kids lots of hugs and it has been well received.  Even today when we were all a little upset with each other, I didn’t let the girls go off to school without a hug.  I came to sit down at my desk and saw this note at my monitor.  It softened my heart, and it’s a good thing it did that!

On to next week.  More hugs!